you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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