Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
whose parrot is this?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
