i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
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