Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Randomize
