walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He better not be in your backpack
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
