That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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