He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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