so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
it's like iHOP with fire
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
