8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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