I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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