Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
