she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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