The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
