maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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