Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
