I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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