babies were throwing up all over the place
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
