hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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