I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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