I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
