Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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