There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Is this like a preordered booty call?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
