No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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