just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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