Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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