Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
