Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
