party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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