"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
