pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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