trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
where does the pee come out of this thing
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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