Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I still have a little drunk in my system
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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