i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
God I need to hump something, right now.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
