K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
