She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize