it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i love accidental penises.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Randomize
