just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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