it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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