i don't like sucking hair
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize