Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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