Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
