I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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