i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I'm sobbing to NWA
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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