Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
