Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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