i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
