dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
