this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
