Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
You've changed since you got that strap on
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
