I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
